Fun post I did for Straub Photography

"A Straub-hosted, Nabisco-inspired note to salespeople:
You need not be slimy to be enjoyable"

At approximately 1:22pm on Thursday, August 2nd one of our favorite clients popped by the studio for a scheduled photo shoot. Making an immediate bee-line to the office of yours truly, Kristy Charrion he quickly was blocked by a Mr. David Straub with a petite, yet full Styrofoam bowl* of Nabisco(R) Wheat Thins. After a few "hellos" and some quick chit-chat our friendly, yet marvelously uncouth client confronted Mr. Straub with a shocking inquiry:

Beloved Client: "So David, are those regular Wheat Thins, or Reduced Fat?"
Mr. David Straub: (In all his eloquence, still working on a few crumbs).... "Regular, why?"

---- Now, anyone can see that the Client, who we are still quite fond of at this point as set the stage for potential disaster depending on how David is feeling that day... did he have his coffee this morning, is he perhaps a bit curious as to the nature of this question, did the client-we-like-so-much just upset the delicate balance of David's body image????? ----

Beloved Client: Just curious, don't get me wrong - i like them both, but the Reduced Fat ones just aren't as greasy and
do taste just as delicious.
Mr. David Straub: (Looking suspicious, and maybe standing a bit more upright and speaking in fluid sarcasm) uh huh,.... now, didn't you come here to shoot something?
Beloved Client: (Genuflecting, forehead to ground)... Mr. David Straub - i only meant to say that both were an excellent choice for your main-course of "lunch" today and that i find them tasty too....
Mr. David Straub: Perhaps, if we decide to let you in to our "We love our clients" party we'll serve up that special snack cracker and put your name on the bowl.... maybe. (Now you can see the trouble, all caused by the genuine love of non-greasy Wheat Thins)
Beloved Client: (Polishing David's Keen(R) sandals (which isn't necessary btw.)) That would be great, but don't go to any trouble....
Mr. David Straub: Actually, now that you mention it, i do remember the Reduced Fat Wheat Thins being quite tasty...
Beloved Client: (Relieved, wringing out sweat from handkerchief - a few tears of joy visible) They are nutritious as well.

Any spectator could plainly see that this issue of 10% caloric content created a powderkeg-like situation in the office of Ms. Kristy Charrion, if she weren't so well versed in eastern medicine and defenses (such as acupuncture & Jit-Kun-Do) as well as maintaining a "stash" of nitroglycerin, an AED and the whitehouse "Red Button" under her desk - this clearly could have elevated the national defense danger level. Thankfully the conversation moved on to the more typical stories of David Straub living in a supposed "Doublewide" and our client talking about the next triathlon he was going to race. The product shots came out beautifully, as usual and that day the only explosions at Straub involved many millions of photons in the warehouse flashbulbs.


Update: The day after...
Date: 3 August, 2007
Time: 9:07AM

During her morning rounds & inventory of photo supplies our lovely receptionist noticed thirty-seven and a half wheat thins (she's quite thorough) lodged in the insulation-lining around shooting station 11. Suspicions were confirmed when David Straub walked in with an oddly level laceration under his left eye and a bandage on his right index finger. With a smile on his face he popped into Kristy's office and said: "Got him, the Regular ones fly straight and true."


*Straub, including David Straub is very concerned with the health of our environment and normally elects not to use Styrofoam or other non-recyclable materials. In this case the bowl was a gift from a client, which we at Straub collaborative value above oxygen, so we use them over and over again - we promise... and have donated $5 to the world to offset the carbon effect of this blog post.

Straub's Website: Straub Collaborative
Blog: Straub on Blogspot